B-I-N-G-O

I decided to create a 2026 Bingo Card, and I am pretty close to ruining the whole board because of procrastination. I have about 1 hour and 6 minutes to hit post on a blog post (this one), and I am feeling uninspired. I mean, I have thoughts, but they are all unformulated, which is why I am not even sure how work will go tomorrow.

There was a plan. I was going to write a brilliant return post that would hold my “Ins and Outs of 2026”. Instead, I spent the day trying to get as much time on social media as I could because I need to touch grass in February (and cross off another square on my bingo card). Unfortunately, a new job, new apartment, and new life do not mean I’m completely different. I am still weary, overly sensitive, and I have a kind of perfectionism that leads me to stare at a wall because I am afraid I’ll fail.

I am terrified of failing. Oh… cool thing to realize in a middle of a blog post. I mean, a lot of people are scared of failing, but mine has been causing a wee bit of dissociation. And unfortunately, I don’t have my amazing counselor to dissect that with. (yay 🥳)

I won’t lie, the last two weeks were hard. A few moments of “oh, this is an actual L,” and the world is in utter chaos. These moments surely don’t help the current spiral my mental state is trying to take.

So, because of time constraints, we will not be self-therapizing ourselves on a blog and coming up with a sunny conclusion. Instead, I am going to think about the fact I just saw on Facebook. “About 80% of the Psalms are about laments, and less than 5% of the top 100 worship songs in America are about lament.” (Daniel DeWitt)

I am glad I moved to the Chicagoland. It is great, and I go to the city about once every two weeks. However, I am grieving the loss of a life I liked. I think it will be okay if I sit with that for a bit, bake some brownies, and try to figure out how to not feel like an imposter at my job.

Maybe tomorrow I will actually post that “Ins and Outs” list and start my blogs closer to the beginning of the month instead of the last hour. But for now, I am going to hit publish so I can bake, go to bed, and not ruin my bingo card the day after making it!

Anyhoo, my bingo card lives to see another month!